Friday, October 30, 2009

Anger in Daily Life

Everyday we meet with certain kind of anger, be it in workplace, on the street, in conversation, you named it.

Anger excites your adrenaline and causes uncontrollable outburst of harsh words and actions not conducive to a real human being.

Hence, anger management is important to forge a peaceful co-existence among friends, among nations and families.

Many of us are easily agitated and irritated by others actions just because we feel that we should be treated as how we treat others. Be nice and courteous. But the world is a complex place with so many different characters of mind and thoughts and definitely unreasonable actions. We should take anger that comes our way with greater understanding of the other party. Why is he/she so angry in the first place? What have I done wrong that he is so angry with me? Sometimes, you may not be able to find the answers. So, like the 'garbage truck' episode, just smile and do not take heart. Most situation will be diffused.

Living in the world is never easy. Whatever we do, we will be criticised or commented upon.
If we are easily angry just by what people says, we will have lost our battle to manage our anger.

Meditation will help greatly in this aspect of life. Meditation encompasses a serene disposition of sort and through constant practice will enhance our ability to contain our anger and look at happenings in a different light and thus become more analytical of the situation and less angry in unpleasant moments. We practise self-control. We will achieve calmness at all times. My years of meditation helps me alot. I used to be a very temperamental impatient youth in my younger days. The years teach much which the days never known. I am more tolerant to others outburst and anger now.

Venerable Thubten Chodron in her book, "Working with Anger" said and I quote a paragraph from her book : "In one way, we can say it's others' nature to criticise, find fault and blame. They're sentient beings caught in the prison of cyclic existence, so naturally their minds are obscured by ignorance, anger and attachment. Our minds are too. If that is the situation, then why expect ourselves or others to be free of misconceptions and negative emotions? There's no reason to be angry at them because they harm, just like there's no reason to be angry at fire because it burns. that's just the way it is". - unquote.

In short, we are all human, with emotions. As seeing ignorance is the curse of God. Knowledge (to diffuse and contain ANGER), the wing wherewith we fly to Nibbana.

patrick lee s j